Ignite manage your mates course

Be their buddy and their boss.

You want to be liked. We all do. But we’ve also got work to do. This course will help you find ways to manage interpersonal conflict and become the kind of boss you always wished you’d had.

The Problem

It’s hard to maintain a friendship while having power over someone. Whether you’ve been promoted ahead of them, or this was always the way things are, you struggle to straddle the gulf between a friend and a boss. Perhaps you are prone to getting cranky, or maybe you go the other way – and to avoid confrontation you seem to be doing all their work yourself. How on earth do you do an appraisal when you’ve been doing all their work for them?

The Solution

Develop your presence. Speak clearly When someone strong, calm, confident and competent is in charge, we don’t mind being told what to do. With that, and some really effective feedback techniques, and a clear way of asserting yourself while maintaining rapport, these challenges can not only be manageable, but enjoyable. Be their friend and their boss.


With a mixture of theory, games, and truly experiencing the effect of these techniques, you’ll find new ways of managing these age-old power dynamic problems. This isn’t just about management, it’s also about people skills. After all, this isn’t a problem you’re going to face just once, in all likelihood you’ll be dealing with rapid promotions for the rest of your working life!

For the list lovers

Managing your mates is in two main areas:


Managers need presence. They need to have the confidence to give instructions, boldly and clearly. Confusion leads to conflict and it costs money. Delegates on this course will develop a strong presence:

  • Physically – standing, walking and breathing in a way that exudes control and calm
  • Verbally – being heard, speaking clearly and with gravitas
  • Mentally – to motivate people, great leaders:
    • Focus on the future, on outcomes over processes.
    • Maintain a robust and resilient mental demeanour – to overcome challenges and to corral emotions, and not let stress and frustration put them out of balance.
    • Transactional Analysis: Understand the Parent/Adult/Child and Drama Triangle social dynamics, and use that understanding to maintain a resourceful state

Influence and Persuasion

Making people do things for you isn’t as hard as you may think. Often it’s simply a matter of instructing them clearly. Other times, it can be more of a challenge – to make someone want to do something. It’s that magic word: Motivation.

  • Listening / Clean Language – for digging down to understand someone’s deeper motivations, making them more persuasive and able to handle conflict
  • Geeing up the troops – boosting morale while giving clear commands (using those motivators)
  • Feedback techniques – having the courage to start those difficult conversations, and the insight to handle them well:
    • Shit Sandwich (novice)
    • Action, Impact, Desired outcome (intermediate)
    • Observe, Define, Discuss (expert)
  • Vulnerability – The power of showing your hand, being open and honest and above all else: Fallible
  • Recognise and celebrate excellence – Focusing your mind (and words) on the results you want to see, rather than focusing on what’s going wrong, letting exemplars within your team shine


While this course was originally designed for people who are new to management roles, we’ve found that even quite experienced managers have really benefited from the exercises and ideas in this workshop.



  • Greater workplace harmony, and reduced turnover, as changing power dynamics are handled with presence, maturity and compassion.
  • Higher performing teams as more time is spent working for clients, rather than managing interpersonal issues.
  • Employees with greater enthusiasm for their work as they focus on career progression and results.
  • Land larger accounts: Team cohesion comes across in pitches and presentations the strength of relationship seeps from every pore. Teams with greater rapport land more work.
  • Personal outcomes: Greater confidence in ones own managing ability, or confidence in ones managers’ abilities. Relaxation. Fun. Laughter. Work. Profit.


  • By the conclusion of this programme, participants will:
  • Be able to walk and talk in a way that exudes gravitas
  • Speak well, and have the confidence to issue clear commands
  • Maintain an even and commanding emotional state in stressful situations
  • Have the courage to broach difficult conversations
  • Understand and be able to deploy a variety of feedback techniques, including:
  • Action, Impact, Desired outcome
  • Observe, Define, Discuss
  • Have a clear understanding of their relationship with others in terms of person versus position
  • Be able to show vulnerability effectively so that it compliments their influence
  • Be able to assertively define their position while maintaining rapport with their direct reports
  • Understand the Parent/Adult/Child and Drama Triangle relationship dynamics, and adjust their style accordingly
  • Be able to recognise and celebrate success within one’s team ecologically (and know to never bitch or moan)

Next steps: 

  • Career coaching
  • Always learning
  • Storytelling
  • How to argue well
  • Mentoring programme
  • Leadership Development Programme

Call us

For an initial free consultation on how we can help with management training challenge, call us on + 44 (0)207 205 4250 or email